Self Diagnosis, and Why It's Okay.

Since starting this journey, I've gone back many times to read old reddit comments or YouTube comments from when I was only just starting to suspect I could be autistic. And in almost all of them it starts with "I don't want to self diagnose, but..."

I was always told growing up, that self diagnosis was bad. It was bad and you shouldn't do it. But these days I know that's not true. Faking a diagnosis for attention is bad. Self diagnosis, is not. The two are very different. And people never realise that.

When most people think of self diagnosis they think of the 2014 Tumblr user saying they're depressed cause they're an angsty teen and they feel a bit sad. But we aren't in that era anymore. The days of romanticising mental health issues are (mostly) over. (arguably the rise of TikTok have brought this back, depending on what side of the app you're on.)

But true self diagnosis isn't just flaunting your personal issues to get attention online. It's researching a disorder you think might fit you, and giving yourself that label with the intention of getting an official diagnosis if it is possible. It's giving yourself a label so you can understand yourself at a deeper level, and feel more comfortable knowing that you're not just weird or lazy. That there's a name for what you're experiencing.

There are a few common arguments used against self diagnosis.

• That we're taking resources from actual diagnosed people who need it

• That we're causing diagnosed people to not be taken seriously

• That we're spreading harmful stereotypes about whatever disorder it is we're self diagnosing with.

Firstly:

I really don't understand that first argument. How can we take resources from diagnosed people when you need a diagnoses to access most of said resources. And besides, as is the case for most self diagnosed people, we have struggles that we deal with every day. Heck, that's how we end up researching into the issue in the first place. If we didn't struggle, we wouldn't bother searching for an answer because we wouldn't need one. So to help ease our struggles, we might seek certain resources. If we need these resources, and they help, then why shouldn't we be able to use them? If we're taking those resources away from those who need it, that's not our fault. Its the fault of whoever is providing those resources (likely the government or healthcare system), for not being able to produce enough. But as I said, you need a diagnosis to access most resources, especially those that are limited. Any resources that we can access without a diagnosis, are things that aren't as limited.

The second argument just ignores the core of the issue. The issue isn't us self diagnosing, it's those who would look at a diagnosed person and decide to not take them seriously simply because some people out there are self diagnosing that disorder. It just doesn't make sense. If people aren't being taken seriously, that's not our fault. It's the fault of those who aren't taking others seriously.

The third argument, I could understand looking at it from the old 2014 Tumblr definition of self diagnosis. But honestly, it's almost insulting to me, to say I spread harmful stereotypes about autism when I've spent the last year of my life (and longer) researching the ins and outs of autism, every small detail about its traits, how it presents in different people. I feel like I know almost everything there is to know about it. So to say I could spread harmful stereotypes about it, is insulting to me. It dismisses all the time I've spent researching and reading into autism. The current harmful stereotypes being spread about autism is:

• that it only appears in AMAB people,

• that we're all genius kids who like maths or science,

• that we can't make eye contact and have no empathy

• many many others...

I could go on. There are so many misconceptions about autism. I know what those misconceptions are, and I do not perpetuate them. For one, I am AFAB, I'm definitely not a genius, I don't like maths or science (unless its an especially interesting aspect of maths or science... ok yeah I may know 95 digits of pi off by heart, maybe I'm not the best example for that, but I'm not like that anymore...). I'm much more interested in words and language; I love learning about grammar, other languages, and I hope to be a writer in the future. I can make eye contact, though I find it uncomfortable if I'm thinking about it too much, in which case, its an internal experience that cannot be perceived by others. I definitely do have empathy, I am incredibly empathetic, I just don't know what to do with that empathy. I feel others pain but I don't know how to help them.

Anyway, my point:

If you believe you may have a certain disorder, and you have researched it enough to where you know what it is to a decent about of detail, then its fine to identify with that disorder while you wait for the day you can get an official diagnosis. You're not harming anyone. All it will do is make you feel more comfortable in yourself and understand yourself better.

Self diagnosis is okay. It's as simple as that.